Finding My Happy

Part of the reason, well most of the reason, why I wanted to lose weight was to be happy. Happy in my marriage, happy with my life, just a happier person all around. Sometimes life is just a big 'ole mess though, and happy is the last thing I am. This week was one of those weeks where I just wanted to hide under the covers. I had a million things to do, not enough time to do them, and to be honest, my kids are growing way too fast and I've had to deal with that reality a lot this week.

I've talked some about how my oldest, Joshua, is going to Kindergarten. As a teacher, I'm so excited for him! This is such an exciting time in his little life. He's so happy to go and make friends, he's asked once a day every day this summer when it was time for "big school".


As a mom, though, I feel like I'm losing Josh in a way. I know I sound ridiculous, but that's just the way it feels. I'm dealing with it, but I can't say right now that I'll be one of those moms throwing a party as the school bus drives away. Maybe next year, but not this year. With a husband who is gone so much with schools and training, field ops and deployments, Josh and I have become "battle buddies" over the years. Even when he was too young to remember, he was my "battle buddy". We got through all those times together.

As I lay in bed 2 nights ago with my husband telling him all of this, I realized something; I never got that time with Jake, our 2 year old. Now it's going to be Jake's turn with me. I am excited now to have this time with Jake, and to have some one-on-one time with him. That actually made things a lot better for me.

Some of you veteran moms are laughing at me right now I imagine, and that's okay. I know it sounds silly. I just love my kids to pieces and all the time that I've had with them. They are my happy.  They make me laugh, smile, and love the life I live.


I'm taking the time everyday now to "find my happy". I never used to do this, and I honestly think it makes me happier. I take time to thank God for my little ones and all the things that make me happy. Sometimes there is this pressure to be this "perfect mother" when in reality, there is no perfect mom. I've come to terms with that, and now I'm on a mission to just be happy. Working out makes me happier all around, which is something I never thought I'd say. I am a happier person when I'm healthy. I'm no longer depressed, wallowing in shame like I used to. My life used to pass me by everyday, but now I feel like I'm living my life. I wished for this, prayed for this, for so long. I won't let a week ruin that. Even on my bad days, I have to have a talk with myself about "eating my emotions". I can't do that anymore. I won't allow myself to do that. I deal with my emotions, work them out, rather than making my day worse by eating myself into depression. In return, my kids learn how to deal with emotions, too.
I should have done this when I was over wight and I never did. I should have learned to embrace little moments. It was so hard back then between the depression I had and just being so unhealthy. I was happy, but to a point. I'm now learning how to really live, and how to really love. My weight loss journey wasn't just about weight, it helped me learn about life. I learned more about myself in the process than about healthy living.

What makes HarperGirl happy today?
-A sweet text message from my hubby on duty today.
-Spending the day with both of my kids.
-Putting out Halloween/Fall decor.
-Coffee.
-New jeans.
-Baking an afternoon healthy snack with Josh.
-Day 2 of breaking Jacob of his pacifier (the worst is behind us, yeah!!)
-Movie and snack time with Josh while Jake naps.

What makes you happy today?
HarperGirl

Another week of Insanity!

I haven't posted in the past week because I've been frustrated with blogger. It's not allowing me, and a million other users, to upload pictures. And what's a blog post without pictures?!

I want to show you my new family planner, random dinner shots, and post what this monster typhoon looks like. So I've switched to HTML mode. Take that, Blogger. ::Sticks tongue out:: Anyways, I'm almost done with another week of Insanity! Who has stuck with it with me? I think a few of you dropped out, so I hope that some of you are still around! Comment below if you're still sticking through it!

Want a tip? Sleep in your workout clothes. I used to do this quite often when I was first starting out and lacked morning motivation. I still do it sometimes, it just makes my morning run smoother. Here is proof:


I got something in the mail this week that made me SQUEE! I got my family planner I ordered from www.erincondren.com and it. is. amazing. I cannot say enough good things about it. I've been able to organize my meal plan for my family, workout plan with Insanity, bills, school schedule, work in my new vinyl shop, and stuff for my husband's job. It's amazing, it really is.

Don't I look happy? I am. I'm super-duper happy. Organization makes me really happy....I think I'm turning into my mother. Shhh....

In other news in the HarperGirl house, we met little man's Kindergarten teacher today. She's super sweet, we really like her. My little guy was somewhat nervous, which is way out of character for him. I think he will love it though, he's always loved school. He's so outgoing, which is nothing like me! He's my little extrovert :)

We have a ginormous typhoon about to hit us here in Okinawa, and it's quite scary-looking on radar.


See the little white outline at the tip of the arrow? That's us. We have 2 major typhoons out there that will be hitting us starting Sunday. The big one hits Sunday, the other one Tuesday. So if I'm gone from my facebook site for a few days, you'll know why. Rest assured, I'm not floating on a board somewhere in Japan, but stuck in my house with no Internet. Our home on base is like a concrete bunker with reinforced glass, nothing is going to get us in here besides the humidity after the power clicks off. Board games are being collected around the house!

I may be in for a long weekend. And what bothers me most...If I lose power I can't do Insanity or run on my treadmill!! Sad face. I'll have to wing it.

Stay tuned, folks, I'll let you know how that works out.

Till then, keep smilin'! <---as Shaun T says!

HarperGirl

Week 2!

Okay so the week is a far cry from over, but this is the time where a lot of people drop out of programs like Insanity. DO. NOT. QUIT. If you feel tired, and a little sore, good! All that pain, sweat, and struggle is progress in the making! Unless your injured...and that's not my department. Anyways, I'm having fun with round 2! I'm making progress. I lost a half of an inch on my waist already, and down almost a pound. I'm ecstatic with the progress so far!

There I am after my workout this week! I'm smilin' cause I love it....or cause it's over. Take your pick!

I'm also playing with different foods and trying to make my meals more interesting, especially dinner. My boys have been requesting different dinners, but I have to keep them healthy. I've been putting my slow cooker to good use lately, even indulging in those "chop and freeze" bags so I just have to grab a bag out of the freezer and put it in my cooker all day and dinner is done. Here is one of my dinners from last week

This was really good! Teryaki Chicken, just chicken, teryaki sauce, red onion, baby carrots, and garlic. I put it over some rice and the boys ate it all. WIN.

Here is breakfast from this week

People, this is CHOCOLATE PUMPKIN oatmeal. Yes. You read that right. A pack of high fiber brown sugar oatmeal, little bit of cocoa powder, 1/4 cup pumpkin, and 1/3 cup water, and a sprinkle of Splenda. Perfection. Great for after Insanity!

My oldest is almost ready for kindergarten, I'm trying to open up a shop out of my home, and my toddler is cutting his 2 year molars. It's getting crazy in HarperGirl's world, but I still make fitness a huge priority. So much has been happening lately, and things are constantly changing. But that is life. We are always growing and changing, and we have to learn to adapt to all of it.

If I've learned anything from this process it's this; I can be miserable, or I can be happy. Either way, I have the power to change myself. Only I can get myself up in the morning to workout. Only I can opt out of eating a cheeseburger and order a salad instead. Only I can decide to deal with my emotions rather than eat them. I can make excuses, or I can make progress.

With that, I am out of here. I have more orders to complete, and two children to run around after.

HarperGirl

Week 1!

Hello!

So, how is my group doing the first week of the challenge? Are you feeling the burn? Don't worry, that pain you feel right now is the beginning of progress. You have to go through this to get through to your results. It will be worth it, I promise. Stick with it, don't give up. The first few weeks of Insanity are notorious for putting on weight, so don't fret if you see the scale move up a little. It's water weight from your muscles changing and growing. Month 2 you'll start losing that and slim down.

My son's 2nd birthday was this past weekend. My amazing friend, Kayti, was my photographer, and she did a phenomenal job.

Isn't he adorable? We had a lot of fun celebrating together, being with our friends and *gulp* indulging on that cake.

Probably the best cake I've ever had in my entire life. Sorry, grandma.

There's me and the hubs, cheesin' it up for Kayti. Don't mind my epic tan lines going on. I think this is one of the best pics of my husband and I ever. HUGE thank you to my Kayti for this one. She's amazing.

We had so much fun with everyone. I introduced a few friends of mine to quinoa. I tried to have some healthy options at the party. Parties are difficult. I had a lot of Marines there, and let's just say those guys can EAT. We went through a lot of food this weekend, but it was so worth it.

So this week was damage control for the splurging. Not much, just that blasted cake. I made sure we had NO leftovers! This is how we did it:

He had a blast smashing that cake. I don't blame him. The Cookie Monster was make of cookie dough. NO LIE. I'm not a cake fan at all, but yeah....

So to do damage control this week, we've had a lot of good wholesome clean foods for dinner. Tonight, it's slow cooker chicken teriyaki. NOMMY.


Make sure you check in with me on how you're doing with Insanity. Click my facebook page over to the side --------------------->
I update that several times a day!

HarperGirl

Insanity Group

If you're participating in the group, please sign your name below in the comment box.

By signing/typing your name below you are acknowledging the following:

1. This is strictly voluntary.
2. You are approved by a doctor to do this program
3. HarperGirl is not held liable for any injury whatsoever
4. You will have FUN!!
5. You've added HarperGril on Facebook to keep up with the group updates!
6. Did I mention the FUN!?
7. You have the program!

So sign your name below so I can get a headcount for my group! I'll be updating through my HarperGirl facebook profile and through the HomeFront Warriors group page.

Only a few days left!!

Comment away!

<3 HarperGirl